You know you're screwed when you've soiled yourself and puked at the same time, in public.
You know you're screwed when your friend says: "Uh, about your car..."
You know you're screwed when your bank account displays "Negative $12,829,116.91"
You know you're screwed when your sex-tape leaks to the internet.
You know you're screwed when you find a new sex dvd... and your brand new bride is the covergirl.
You know you're screwed when you suddenly receive 404 errors on your website.
You know you're screwed when you receive a letter with free tickets to 'Springer', 'Steve Wilco' and 'Maury' for the same day.
You know you're screwed when your cellmate is three times your size
You know you're screwed when the woman you've slept and had sex with doesn't say she's 1000% certain that you're the father, but rather 100%.
Maury reference.
You know you're screwed when you get special guest tickets to Sally Jessie Raphael and find the show is about late bloomers... and you're a GUY!