Federal Bureau of Instigation

[kyonides]

Federal Bureau of Instigation

by Kyonides

Chapter One

The Takeover Finally Revealed

Rain. Who cares about it, right people? Well, he cares. Deeply. As much as to keep him yelling at it for an hour or so while walking around his office, full of papers and photographs. The guy could wear out his own carpet if he keeps doing that for another year for sure. He is a real weirdo, don’t you think?

Finally, he leaves the place after carefully locking the door. Quickly he realized he had left his badge inside and opened the darn door and drew near his desk to pick it up. That simple mistake he made pissed him off. Guaranteed.

“This cannot continue the way it is now. We got to put an end to his mischief immediately or else our beloved nation will suffer the dire consequences of his insurrection” Agent Trickster uttered during his most recent “speech” at the FBI headquarters in DC.

Just in case you did not know this, there was a painting of a fox hanging close to our beloved speaker.

Basically, his audience was composed of fellow agents having several cups of coffee in a row. Who else would listen to such a lunatic? Fine, you got me. Anybody who had watched that famous TV series in the nineties would have paid attention to his utterances just because. Also add all those people that for no specific reason call a former president an idiot because reasons do not matter anymore there.

“And how are you supposed to solve all of the problems of our nation, Agent Trickster?”, Lurker inquired of his colleague.

No, it was not easy to answer such a question at all. Why would it ever be? It had been excessively easy to keep criticizing the established world order, but replacing it with a new order, where his vision for the future would be successfully implemented, was another story. Wasn’t it?

“I’m glad you asked, Agent Lurker, I’m truly am”, the plotter reacted. “We have no reason to do all the hard work ourselves. Instead we will hire somebody else to do it for us. Money doesn’t matter here, we can always count on our own lobbyists in the Capitol. Thus, we’ll let this guy uncover all of our person of interest’s skeletons that he has been hiding in his closet until now.”

“Nice idea, buffoon!”, a dissenter made his own remark out of the blue. “And which department will get the cut? Maintenance? IT? The cafeteria? You name it!”

“Ha, ha, Agent Mockingbird”, the proposer commented filled with disgust. “Just for you to know, we’ve count on very friendly allies both in Congress and the Senate that will ensure we get all the extra money we’d ever need for our enterprise.”

“First get your butt over here, Trickster!”, another coworker cried out loud. “The meeting is about to start with or without you, loser.”

People there could not understand how one conscious and motivated agent was trying not to fix the whole world but his own nation. They still needed some convincing for sure.

“Gotcha, guys!”, Trickster stated. “If results is what you need the most, that’s what you’re gonna get from me and then you’ll know that I’m the guy that should lead the team that will kick him out from power… for good.”

Several of the few agents still present there chuckled when he made that promise, one that he could never keep no matter how hard he would work for the agency in the next couple of years. In fact, they showed no respect for him. For instance, one of them was skillful enough as to placed a sticky note on his back saying “Kiss This Rebel’s Butt!” without him ever noticing it.

The supervisory agent in charge of the next case stepped into the medium sized conference room he had previously reserved. He stopped for a brief moment only to carefully read that note on Trickster’s back and simply made a face as if he had already bought that story without even thinking it twice. Then he went all the way to the empty whiteboard.

“Guys, I don’t have to treat you like little girls, right?”, the boss spoke. “So let’s get straight to business. We’ve got a hostile situation in Maryland where a mock of a joker using the alias of Cheesie James is threatening pizza guys or even the local restaurants by telling them that they only have three more days to send their online payments to the suspect’s offshore accounts. All of them should be made in a pretty much unknown cryptocurrency, the Skipcoin.”

Trickster took his seat across the room after the current case had caught his attention against all odds.

“Wait a second!”, he suddenly demanded. “Cheesie James… Where have I heard that alias before? Was it in a local newspaper? Or was that news headline linked to that infamous terrorist cell that sparked an uproar among the journalists and their guest commentators?”

“Actually, that’s for you all to find out!”, the boss roared. “Now get your coats and take the cars for we’re now headed to Baltimore, like it or not.”

The loudmouth was making his own calculations and noticed that they would need to get three cars in order to transport all of the men to that city.

“Oh and don’t let Agent Trickster get the driver’s seat at all costs!”, the supervisory agent commanded.

Awesome, he had quickly become a commuter…

To be continued...

...some day!