What I will have to post here as it is a general critique, is that coming up with the story as you go is rarely a good idea. You should at least have a rough plan from beginning to end of what is going to happen. I'll pm you if I think of some ideas.
You should spice your thread up a bit with some BBcode. Change the size of elements to make it more tidy.
You should spice your thread up a bit with some BBcode. Change the size of elements to make it more tidy.
Valdred
Tech Administrator of Save-Point
Tech Administrator of Save-Point