Riddles and Dragons

[DerVVulfman]

These are a couple of comical Dungeons and Dragons anecdotes, ones that are considered legendary though now vanishing from the internet.  And whats more, the first one was a story relayed by the DM and not one of the players.  So here they are for your enjoyment:

RIDDLES

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The Party approaches a bridge guarded by humongous troll with equally sized two-handed troll maul. The party stops short of the bridge.  After some time, the troll looks on and shouts ‘SEND FORTH YOUR BEST RIDDLER!’

There is heated argument about who is the best riddler among the players…

'I should go!’….’I have the best intelligence’ etc…

Finally one of the players marches up to the troll. ‘I’m the best riddler!’ he announces brightly.

The troll splats him dead. ‘I hate riddlers.’

Anonymous

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SNEAKING UP ON DRAGONS!

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A party of adventurers finds a sleeping dragon and its hoard. The lawful, yet stupid Paladin decides he must slay yon evil beast, of course/ To do so, he found he has to first cross an underground stream. QUIETLY he removes his armor and sword and tells others to throw his sword to him after he crosses. The Paladin crosses and signals for his sword, all the while the dragon is still asleep.

DM: “Roll a d20 to throw the sword to him.”

Player: (rolls a d20) “A One!”

DM: “A critical fumble, you impale the paladin with his own sword.”

DM: (asking the paladin) “You’re about to pass out, what do you do?”

Paladin: (cold bloodedly) “I scream.”

Anonymous