Not THAT Kind of Role Play
#1
Trust me guys, I didn't come up with this.
I got this from a website recounting pen-n-paper RPG stories.
Unfortunately, no names were attributed.


Not THAT Kind of Role Play

I’m 17 and I work as an au pair in Germany, looking after two children. I’ve asked my employers if I can take a weekend and a Friday off during June to go to Amsterdam with my girlfriend and her father for a tabletop RPG convention, and am now trying to explain what RPGs are. The dialogue takes place in German, which is not my first language.

Me: *haltingly* You pretend to be a character and play a story with other people.

Mother: Like theatre? On a stage? I didn’t know you were an actress!

Me: No, no, just in a room with a few people. No audience. You just make up the story as you go along. *I mean to say costumes, but instead say clothing* You don’t wear any clothing but sometimes you have props.

Mother: *obviously thinking it’s something sexual and being horrified because of my age* Is that legal?!

Me: *not understanding her horror* Yes, of course! People come from all over the world; meeting new people is part of the fun.

Mother: I don’t think you should go… Your girlfriend’s father plays as well?

Me: *suddenly realises my mistake* “Oh… OH! I meant costumes, not clothing! Everyone wears clothing! No one takes their clothing off! Especially not [Girlfriend’s 56-year-old father]!

We laughed over the mistake later and I managed to explain better, but I don’t think I’ll ever forget the time I told the mother of the children I look after that I play games with strangers with my clothes off!
Up is down, left is right and sideways is straight ahead. - Cord "Circle of Iron", 1978 (written by Bruce Lee and James Coburn... really...)

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