The pointless argument thread

[Jacket]

Glass can be heavier than wood, but have you seen these desks? Their just a few small panels of glass. I can carry all six of those panels with one arm. And as for not wearing, or being damaged, where's the character in that?!

You see a brand new book, perfectly white pages. The binding perfect. The glue isn't even cracked. No bent corners. It looks too new. It assaults our senses and we want, so very much, just to touch it. To leave a smudge, a finger print - anything! Anything that would give this thing character! Same with a desk! A table! Everything!

You can't have a story that's clean, it needs to have a smudge, a dent - a crack even. Now you're not just weak of body, but weak of character as well!

[Kristovski]

This is a pointless argument! Everyone knows that you should build desks out of baby foxes. The fur helps to insulate the paper, leaving your letters with a warmer feel instead of just cold dead letters.

[MetalRenard]

If you ever touch me or my kind I will burn all your other furniture!

[Kristovski]

But that just puts us back on the side of stone! You're not helping the argument here, Fox. We could use beaverskins instead....

[DerVVulfman]

I'm against carbon fiber as all carbon products come from the dreaded coal mines. And we've had enough coal mine disasters recently. Go with some other resin. Perhaps amber. It's cool looking and you may find a fly trapped in the goo.

[Kristovski]

I don't want to have to worry about children extracting DNA from mosquitoes and creating prehistoric beasts. Beaver pelts are clearly the best choice.

[Kirito]

beaver pelts are good, but pelts from platypus are better. As with beaver pelts, platypus pelts are water resistant, however, with the male platypus, you also have the option of using it's natural neurotoxins to protect sensitive documents ( be sure to wear gloves, possibly beaverskin ones ).

[Kristovski]

Good point, Kore. The natural toxins would also protect from wear and tear of bacterial disintegration. The only problem is the rarity of the skins, leaving this option inevitably the demise of the platypus. Hedgehog would work better, plus it would give you places to stab bills (not of the platypus kind, of course).

[MetalRenard]

Yeah well foxes (and squirrels) are the only animals really worth saving.

[Kristovski]

psshaw. Foxes are meant for coats and squirrels are only worth saving for stew. Whatever happened to save the whales?